Saturday, April 9, 2011

Just A Random Post

Today is 2 weeks from my New Patient Orientation appointment. I am feeling sort of numb over it, which is better than being anxious at least. I guess.

We just attended our annual convention this past weekend where I was spiritually up built…as much as one can be with these other things weighing on my mind. I am working on placing those burdens on God as directed to do so in the Bible…and leaving them there. That is my issue though, I have a bad habit of taking them back.

Hubs is still struggling. It seems he does great for a day or two or even three and then plummets again despite the meds increase. He actually was able to get in and see a specialist to deal with the meds yesterday and we will hopefully see some improvement soon. On an up note his disability claim was approved…for the first month he was out, now to work on the next and current one we are in. So some things will be able to be paid, others will still need to wait.

Mentally I feel as if my thoughts are running all around like a dogs chasing their tails and bumping into each other. I sometimes cannot even get words to formulate to speak or even think them.

I feel really beat down…not all the time, but sometimes. Then the numbness feeling comes. I am doing my best dealing with this and trying to shield my kiddos as best as possible. I love Hubs and hurt for him. I cannot fully admit to knowing exactly how he feels or what he is going through, all I know is his sadness hurts me for him…does that make sense?

To take pictures or not to take pictures. I love photos I think no matter the content they describe things so much better than words possibly could. I have an issue though. I have misplaced my battery charger for my camera! SIGH The brain has been really scattered of late and this is one of the results of it. I want to take my food pics…for me…it is a good diary to show what I am eating, but cannot. My Ipod does have a camera though the pics are not that great however may go ahead and use it anyway.

Yep another random post.

I am moving forward indeed with the weight loss surgery at this point. Knowledge is what I am looking for…help…understanding…support.


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